Have you seen this man?

The Next President of the United States?

Don't laugh ...

This guy's got everything he needs to win a US election:

* Plenty of money – check

* Nice tan (not orange like Boehner) – check

* Self-made millionaire (he could run for US Senate!) – check

* Former two term governor of a cool western state – check

* Get troops out of Afghanistan now – check

* Opposed war with Iraq (he sez)– check

* Blames Republicans for spending ( bipartisan) – check

* Worked his way through college as a construction worker (has a truck?) – check

* Wants to repeal the Republican Big Pharma prescription health care benefit –check

* Supports legalizing marajuana – big check with rednecks

* And closing our schools (why bother? Let's get high!)

* Climbed Mount Everest, & skis !

All these things play well with an electorate that hasn't been paying attention for thirty years and wants to feel better about itself, about the lies it swallowed whole while covering its ears and yelling "lalalalal" . So.. What's not to like?

Well...let's just take a sec and read that fine print at the bottom of his position paper, shall we? He wants to abolish Obamacare, cut Medicare, Medicaid (and make them block grants to the states so they can be pilfered worse than they already are by big health insurers), and cut defense spending, all by 43%. Raise the retirement age to 103 (kidding) ... and change Social Security, most likely not for the benefit of those who depend on it (now more than 70% of Americans over 65.) That weird porcupine hairdo might even go over well in a nation of folks living with nonstop bad hairdays.

Here's the amazing part of this story. No one in the media or anywhere else thinks he has a chance. HA! The guy is no flip flopper, people. He knows what he thinks. Issued no fewer than 750 vetoes during his governorship. Probably a died-in-the-wool Libertarian, and not the We-Are-A-Christian-Nation Tea Party wacko variety either. And not a one issue guy like the Paul clan. Looks to me like good bet for the Repug nomination and maybe the top job, if you're a credit card carrying member of that I've-Got-Mine-Fuck-You-You-Lazy-Ponce Patriots Club that's sweeping the nation.

He's gonna play well in Ohio. Check him out on Colbert a year ago. Pretty slick.

Watch Gary's inspiring video. Plod along as he trains breathlessly for a mythical athletic event. What a guy!